Random Fodder

Outlet protector

I mentioned safety yesterday while I was discussing my son's birthday, which reminded me of one of my least favorite "child security" items: those plastic outlet plug protectors. These devices are dubious at best, and here are some of my personal statistics to back this up:

• 1: Number of times one of my children attempt to place something dangerous in an unprotected outlet.
• 30: Number of times one of my children has miraculously removed the outlet protector and stuck it in his mouth, thus causing a choking hazard.
• 0: Number of times I have been able to remove an outlet protector on my own.

Usually, I cannot remove that outlet protector to save my life. I am forced to use something to pry it away from the outlet, and 95% of the time that object is a metal knife. This makes me feel extremely safe. I raise my eyebrow to any "safety" item that prevents a nonexistant problem, causes a separate safety hazard, and places me in a high-risk safety hazard on a regular basis.

Dylan turned 1 year old today.

They say about children that the time flies by, but I think this is only partially true. On occasion, it feels like the time has flown by, but today (and more often than not) it seems like Dylan has always been in our family. It's incomprehensible that he has been with us for merely a year.

Dylan's teeth still refuse to officially pop through those gums. I've explained to him that he can't grow up with a toothless smile (in this state, anyway), yet he still refuses to teethe.

Dylan doesn't seem to be using any words in my opinion, though my wife swears that his use of da-da and ma-ma are intentional. He does, however, do one horribly cute thing that we really need to videotape soon. When Sebastian pretends to be a puppy and gives off one of his high-pitched barks, Dylan counters with a small little bark of his own.

Dylan loves clapping and dancing to music — "It's Peanut Butter Jelly Time!" is certainly one of his favorites dance tunes.

Dylan is not yet walking without assistance, but that's fine with my wife. To her, less walking is less trouble. I'm not convinced. Once a baby can crawl with ease and pull himself up to a standing position, it's game over on safety. I'm still trying to get him to pull that string that drops the bricks on the raised end of the board he's sitting on so it catapults him up to the fan, which will catch his overalls and spin him around for a while. So far, he hasn't taken the bait. Hours of tape have already been wasted. America's Funniest Home Videos will have to keep waiting.

Don't forget about Dylan's page!

Check out the eyebrow-raising brochure I found during my visit to the urologist.

After tiring of posting personal stuff on The Smarmy Carny, I have decided that I would rather start up a second personal blog to post all the personal drivel that the random viewer doesn't care about.

This should effectively give me a place to toss all the posts with no worth to the general public, as well as a pseudo-test environment for my primary blog.

In addition, I will use this space for Buffalo-related posts and the like as well.

Within a day or two, I will copy any such posts over from The Smarmy Carny one by one.

Since this opening post was so dry, allow me to leave you with a picture that's not so dry.

You know you're a geek when . . .

. . . the first time you wear an athletic support is when you're 30 years old . . .

. . . and even then, it's because the doctor required it for your post-vasectomy care.

This post was originally posted at The Smarmy Carny, Novac's general blog.

Enter the Carousel.

Enter the Carousel. This is the time of renewal.

Logan's Run opened almost 30 years ago (6/23/76) about killing people off at 30. It's my turn to enter the carousel. I plan on watching Logan's Run this week, when I have a couple hours to take the time.

Yes, 1976, back when an average new house cost less than $44,000, people earned just over $16k per year, and a new car would run just about $4500. And don't forget the 59 cents/gallon for gasoline!

Here are the people who wished me a happy birthday, in order of when I received the birthday greeting. Since they didn't know they'd be getting anything out of the deal, free links are included:

1. Dani
2. My 4 1/2 year old son
3. My wife
4. My Saturn salesman
5. My mother
6. Speakup Western NY
7. Gottadeal.com
8. My great-aunt
9. Four co-workers
10. Cold Stone Creamery (including a coupon!)
11. Jippy
12. Fans Of Reality TV
13. Debate Politics
14. Leland
15. My cousin
16. Pimp My Blog
17. Joomla Forums
18. Site5 Webhosting Forums
19. Another cousin
20. My sister-in-law
21. My mother-in-law
22. Marlene

This post was originally posted at The Smarmy Carny, Novac's general blog.